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Thing I wished I knew before becoming pregnant

Updated: Nov 18, 2023

Things you should you know before you have a baby

In the words of my grandmother, the most important thing a woman can accomplish in her lifetime is give birth to a new life, which i absolutely agree.

We all know that having a child comes with its own set of challenges, just like any major shift in our lives. Here are a few things to keep in mind before embarking on the wonderful journey that is parenthood.

1- Pregnancy may be hard

black women pregnat belly

Pregnancy may be one of the happiest moments of your life, but bear in mind that it may not be the happiest from the beginning or it won’t be always happy. I believe that all the pregnant women who are asymptotically throughout the pregnancy are hand-picked by God (ahahah, lucky women!

My pregnancy wasn’t easy from the very beginning. With a pregnancy, everything changes. Your body changes. You will not be the same person you used to be. The hormonal changes, cramps, nausea, vomiting, insomnia, and the last months of your pregnancy where you won’t be able to simply pick something up from the floor. Almost everything you do has to be assisted.

Nobody is ever really ready to go through all those changes, and after going through all of that, I can affirm that pregnancy is not for everybody, so be mindful of everything that comes with the pregnancy so you can prepare yourself and enjoy your pregnancy as much as you possibly can.

2- Breastfeeding is hard

I’ve heard it so many times: "It doesn't hurt to breastfeed." Well, not necessarily. There is no need to feed that fear. However, it is important to keep in mind that breastfeeding is a wonderful experience for every woman and her baby, but you still have to understand that the process of your milk production and feeding can be very painful. From your body adjusting to the milk supply that your baby needs (sometimes you may experience overproduction in the first week of pregnancy), to cracked nipples, you need to be mindful of the possibility that it will occur, as this will give you an opportunity to learn the best coping strategies, as unpleasant as that might be.

Learning how to breastfeed before you have your baby is vital for your own and your baby's well-being. It would be beneficial to take a lactation class or sign up for a pregnancy course. I am sharing this advice with you Mummies because I wish somebody had advised me to take a lactation class, because the first week postpartum was really hard. I had to reach out for professional help to ease my process, and I can assure you it helped a lot.

3- Baby blues

You might experience baby blues. Almost 80 percent of new mothers experience the "baby blues" (also known as "The Three-Day Shock"). These are short-term dips in mood that result from all of the changes that come with a new baby.

Don't feel like you're alone, because you're not. I know you might assume that having a newborn is a reason to feel happy and proud, but for many parents, it's a cause to feel depressed and burdened.

This happens because hormone levels decline after you give birth, which can influence your mood. You're not getting enough sleep because your newborn is likely waking up at odd hours. These feelings often begin when your newborn is just 2 or 3 days old, but you’re likely to feel better by the time your baby is 1 or 2 weeks old. Even though having a baby is without a doubt a blessing, it is important to know all the changes having a baby brings into our lives.

4- Your body will change

Your body will have undergone significant physiological changes and it may be challenging for you to return to the state in which you were previously.

Things are likely to return to their pre-change state after some time has passed. But it's important to remember that the experiences of different women may be very different.

5- Sleep deprivation

"Sleep as much as you can." You will hear this a lot! I bet you have heard it already, but unfortunately, that is not how it works. I slept throughout most of my pregnancy, but it had no effect on the sleep deprivation I had during the first week of postpartum. Parenthood will alter your sleep schedule, so don't expect to get much rest during the baby's early months. The difficult sleeping stage is not unusual for babies; as the infant grows older, the imbalance will disappear.

6- You’ll hear a lot of ”opinions”

Once you get pregnant, everyone will be trying to teach you and suggest how you should or should not do things. Some are there to help, and some are there to just give their "opinions". Be aware that you will hear different opinions on how to deal with your newborn even when you are not seeking them out.

Do not be concerned if you fail to keep up. You must understand that as much as your friends want to help you, there is no one better than you to identify what your newborn baby needs.

My advice is for you to keep an open mind, be patient enough to listen, and be smart enough to be selective. Use only the information that you find valuable and disregard the rest.

7- Possible changes in your relationship

It is important that you and your partner keep in mind that your marriage might shake a bit as your baby arrives.
A baby forces changes in your relationship, and it may take time for you to get back to your old state. Calm down, take a deep breath every day, be patient and work together. It's just a phase.

8- You might make a mistake or two

Remember that mothers are not perfect! The same way, no human being is perfect. You are being a mother for the first time, and you are allowed to make mistakes, especially when you are taking on so much new information.

The good news is that you will learn from those mistakes and you will get better every day.

9- Limit what you buy for your newborn

As much as you see it everywhere, publicities on instagram and facebook, a lot of baby gears you won't even use and most of it you won’t really need. Buy a few clothes for your newborn because the speed at which your baby will grow can be unpredictable. I would recommended you to buy enough clothes to keep your baby covered until he's 3 months old.

As you get to know your baby, you’ll understand his size better, when my baby was 3 month old, he used to wear 6 to 8 months cloths size.

10- You will distance yourself from your friends

Don't be surprised if your friends get a little distant for a while. You will, in fact, be distancing yourself. You will pay attention solely to your baby from this point on. And that’s OK! Your baby needs your full attention. Besides, those that are your real friends will stick around.

I hope this post helped you!
xoxo 😘 Mommylu!


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